When it comes to oral, there’s no better teacher than experience. But if gay hookups are hard to come by, don’t fret; there’s a wealth of information you can read as a gay guy to enhance your game. Learn more about how hot oral sex can be more enjoyable for both the giver and the receiver by following the techniques we share below.
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Why Some Gay Men Prefer Oral Sex
Whether it’s in a long term relationship, a raunchy hookup, gay men having oral sex has historically been a time-honored introduction to an entire world of pleasurable acts. Oral sex has existed way beyond the days of gay dating sites and dating apps. More often than not, a man’s first non-straight sex experience would be in the form of gay fellatio.
The old adage goes, “First love never dies” – true enough, gay men prefer oral sex because of how familiar it feels, how easy it is to do, and how non-committal it seems relative to actual penetrative or anal sex. But while oral sex can feel basic, your skills don’t have to remain elementary.
How To Perfect Your Oral Sex Technique
We all want to be The One who can give the head he won't forget. Oral sex is a gay friendly activity, never one to be turned down by a willing participant. But while it seems all too instinctive (I mean, what could be more natural than a penis entering a hole?), there are a few techniques that will transform your oral sex skills into the stuff of legends.
Sure, it can feel like a lot of work for something that looks so easy. But to quote Samantha from Sex and the City: "Easy? Honey, they don’t call it a job for nothing."
Be A Tease
Setting up mind-blowing oral sex has to start way before the act itself. Sure, there is a stereotype that gay men are total horndogs and ready for a blowjob 24/7, but this isn't true for all. To avoid the guesswork, start dropping hints throughout the day: a naughty, needy sext while he's at work or a sexy, sweat-drenched gym selfie lets him know you are thinking of nothing but his dick in your mouth.
Set The Scene
The beauty of blowjobs is that they can happen anywhere, technically, but comfort is still the most significant factor. Unless it's the good ol' sneak attack or the village glory hole, it doesn't have to be somewhere your knees or neck will curse you for later.
When the mood is right, lead him to the couch or bed. Ensure his back is supported (pillows help!), and you can operate at an angle where you can perform some unencumbered sucking.
Communicate
Any sex columnist or therapist worth a dime would tell you that communication is critical in getting the most pleasure in any sex act.
A lot of people are scared that they might turn their partner off with too much talking. But it's not so much about words – often, the best way to communicate satisfaction is through sound cues like moaning, grunting, slurping. Even non-verbal cues can go a long way, such as stroking, scratching, or touching pleasure points.
Of course, there will be a point where you do have to say something. It doesn’t have to be aggressive or clinical, so don’t be scared to get a little raunchy!
On your knees, you can ask, "Do you like it when I do this?" or "Do you want it faster, baby?" (puppy eyes optional). As long as it sounds natural and in the moment, you can communicate effectively and turn them on simultaneously.
The Main Event
Everything's set, the curtains are up, and the spotlight is on. You're about to blow his mind. Here are a few tips to get you through:
Start by licking the penis head. Nerve endings are concentrated in this area, so it's the most sensitive to the touch. Tease the shaft with little kisses, sucking on its ridges until you feel it fully engorged.
Cover your teeth with your lips while you suck. This technique tightens your mouth, too.
Go down slowly first and settle on a rhythm. You will have to match every sucking with his thrusting. Plus, you’ll find that slow often means more sensual and seductive!
Variety is crucial. While finding a rhythm at the start sets the tone, varying the speed, depth, and pressure of your lips the more you get confident is the key to unforgettable fellatio. By stringing together these variations, some are even able to craft their signature moves! Not a bad time to find yours.
“No hands” is passé – there are just too many pleasure points to explore to leave your hands in the backseat. Gently play with his testicles, stroke up his thighs and his perineum, or reach for his nipples and tweak them. See how he reacts!
Skim the rim. If it starts to feel a little monotonous, go ahead and rim (with consent, of course); this allows you to breathe in more air than when sucking and is a welcome break for a probably overstimulated penis.
Wind it down by stroking his penis more than sucking it. A hand/suck combo can make him cum faster. When he's ready, tell him where he can blow his load if you haven't discussed that yet. Which leads us to…
Spit or swallow?
Ah, the eternal question, as old as Adam and Steve themselves. Since you have been doing the work, you get to choose. What feels comfortable and natural is all that matters. Try not to make a huge deal – most men are happy to shoot it all over you or their belly.
When all that is done, give him a few minutes to recover and remind him it’s your turn now!
To Gag Or Not To Gag: Deepthroat Tips
When gay men deepthroat – that means to suck on the whole penis head, shaft, and all – the penis will most definitely hit the roof of the mouth and trigger our very natural gag reflex. So unless you're a trained sword-swallower, read up:
Gagging doesn't make you any less of a cocksucker – it’s normal. The key is to pull away when you feel like gagging and start again when you’re ready.
Try relaxing your throat. Unclench your mouth and load it up with spit. The cock will slide easily and hit your throat a little gentler.
Again, breathe. There's a way to breathe through the nose consciously, which could be very useful while deepthroating. Just like swimming laps, settle into a rhythm that’s both pleasurable for your partner and comfortable for you!
Hot guy sex doesn’t have to end in gagging; consent is vital here! Communicate clearly beforehand that you will have to stop when you gag, then start again. No one should put their pleasure over someone else's boundaries.
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